Monday, April 28, 2014

about our terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day

Well, we had an insane weekend.

I'm sure most of you have seen on my Instagram or Facebook that we spent Friday night and all of Saturday at the hospital with Graeme. It was the worst night of our life so far.

Graeme had trouble sleeping all day on Friday. He didn't seem to have anything really wrong with him though. He didn't feel warm to me. He was eating like normal. He just didn't want to sleep at all. Even if I held him to put him to sleep, he would just stare around. Aaron was gone all day, and by the time he got home, I was exhausted. 

I let him take over Graeme for awhile, and he tried to lay him down for bed while I took a shower. Graeme slept for all of 20 minutes. It was at this point that Aaron suggested taking his temperature.

I did. And it was 100.8. That isn't high for most people, but our doctor had made it clear that until a baby reached three months, any temperature over 100.4 was dangerous.

I tried not to worry yet. We took his pajamas and blanket off of him in case they were making him extra warm. We took him downstairs and held him. He was SO tired.

I took his temperature again every several minutes over the next half hour. It would fluctuate a bit, but it read above 100.4 a couple more times.

Of course things like this always seem to happen at night or on a weekend. In this case, both. I called our pediatrician's office to get the number for the on-call nurse.

I talked to the phone-answering person who took all of Graeme's information, his symptoms, and my number. He said a nurse would call me back within 10 minutes. When the nurse called, he asked for all of the symptoms again and said a doctor would call within 30 minutes. Good grief with the phone tag.

Finally, someone that represented the doctor (I guess she was a nurse) called. She confirmed his temperature again with me, and then said we needed to bring Graeme to the ER.

Begin major panic.

I stayed calm enough to find out which ER we should go to, but as soon as I hung up, I started sobbing.

Oh, I was a wreck. Thank goodness Aaron is amazing and always calm and strong when I freak out.

We somehow made it out the door 10 minutes later in hoodies and jeans with Graeme, his diaper bag, and one phone charger. That was it. Aaron called my parents and calmly told them the situation and asked them to come get Penny.

I rode in the backseat with Graeme, who was finally fast asleep, and tried not to cry the entire way to the ER. I prayed and prayed.

When we got to the hospital, Aaron couldn't find a parking spot. He circled under the drop-off and said I could take Graeme in while he searched for a place to park. The thought of being without him for even a few minutes was enough to make me cry again. Through my crying/hyperventilating, I managed to say, "Don't leave me! I can't take him in by myself!"

Wonderful Aaron rolled his eyes lovingly (he has to be like that to make up for my over-dramatic emotions in these kind of situations), reminded me again that Graeme was going to be fine, and left the car next to the entrance to walk us inside.

We got checked in and were immediately seen by a triage nurse. She took Graeme's vitals and asked us all about his symptoms again. When she took his temperature, he did not have a fever. For a second, I thought that meant we might be able to leave. Alas, since WE had read a fever at home, they had to check him out.

Little did we know what "check him out" was going to entail...



We were taken to a hospital room in the children's emergency hospital. A doctor came in a few minutes later and we had to explain all of the symptoms again. He then told us the plan.

Since Graeme was so young, a fever is very serious and can be, in some cases, the only sign of a very serious bacterial infection. It can of course just be the result of a virus, but the only way to be sure is to test basically everything. He explained that they would draw blood, urine, and snot (I forget the fancy doctor word for snot). He said that they would need to test for meningitis and other infections by drawing spinal fluid. He also told us we couldn't feed him for the time being.

As soon as the doctor left the room, I lost it again. I wanted there to be some way, any way, that I could take Graeme's place. I wished that I was sick instead. I was freaking out that they were about to poke and prod and torture my little boy (even though I knew it was for his good) who had no idea what was about to happen.  And I didn't even remember what meningitis was, but I knew by the doctor's tone that it could be very serious and terrible. My mind of course leaps to the worst case scenario always.



I will save you from a longer story. Over the next couple of hours, they drew blood and urine and snot. Graeme, as you can imagine, screamed. I cried. Aaron consoled us both. When it was time to draw the spinal fluid, Aaron and I had to leave the room. I didn't even want to think about what they were doing to him, but it was hard not to. It was a very, very long 15 minutes until we could go back in. Graeme looked so tiny on the hospital bed. He was fast asleep.




After that, it was just waiting. Some of the results would be back in a couple hours. Some would take 24 hours. They told us to plan on being in the hospital for two days. When they left the room to let us rest, Aaron and I just looked at each other and were in disbelief of how the night had turned out. We were so drained. All there was left to do was try to sleep until they admitted us upstairs to the hospital.


Putting on our trying to be brave, really tired at 3am faces.




Early Saturday morning, they took us upstairs. Throughout the night, different doctors had come by and given us results as they could. So far, everything had come back negative and looked great. We were reassured, but my mind was still worried about the results that would take longer to get.

We settled into our real hospital room as best we could. Graeme woke up to eat, but he was so exhausted, he went right back to sleep. Aaron's mom brought us breakfast and held Graeme while we tried to sleep on the little pull-out bed thing.

My family came eventually. I was so glad to see my mom. No matter how old you are, sometimes your mom can just make any situation better. We got another hour of sleep while we waited for the doctors to come by.


When the doctors finally stopped by our room, they brought good news. They were impressed with Graeme's results so far, and the fact that he hadn't shown a temperature yet that day. To our delight, they actually gave us the option to go home at the end of the day after Graeme could get one more round of antibiotics to last him another 24 hours. They told us that if they were at all worried about Graeme, they wouldn't even give us the option to leave. They said that it was almost certain that he just had a virus that was probably on it's way out. And they took away my last big worry:  he did not have meningitis.


We were so, so thankful. And so ready to leave. We felt disgusting. And we were ready to take our boy home.

Graeme slept for the majority of the day in the hospital. We tried to sleep as much as we could. By the time of Graeme's evening feeding, Aaron and I felt pretty rested. Graeme must have finally caught up on enough sleep too, because after he ate, he stayed awake for quite awhile and gave us a knock-your-socks-off adorable smile session. He just could not stop smiling. It was the very best end to our awful day. That, and leaving to go home a couple of hours later!










This whole experience taught me many things. Here are a few.


  1. It's easy to say, "I trust God." It's harder to put it into action when you're tested. I had to put my trust in God, because there was nothing else I could do. God answered my prayers and I know He was in control even when I was freaking out. He is constantly faithful to this worrisome mommy.
  2. I have a brand new respect for parents who have children in the hospital all of the time. We were not even there for 24 hours and it was the longest day ever. It is the worst thing seeing your child hooked up to all of those monitors. I can't imagine staying at the hospital with a child long-term.
  3. I would have done anything to take Graeme's place. He's my son, and I couldn't stand seeing him suffer. God loved me enough to let His Son suffer and die for me. I saw His love for me in a new light.
  4. Pediatric nurses and doctors are awesome. They have to do some not fun stuff to little babies and kids all the time. Their job is not for the faint of heart. I am thankful for them and for all the work they put in to do their job.



Graeme is much better. He still has a stuffed-up nose and a little cough, but other than that, he's fine. His pediatrician saw him today and said he looked good. 

The lab will continue to watch his cultures for five days, but it is rare for anything to show up after 48 hours.


Thank goodness that experience is behind us. We are stronger because of it, and we will never forget it!

Leaving the hospital in all the same clothes we came in!


Wednesday, April 23, 2014

about my one-month-old

I am now the mother of a one-month old. Graeme Grayson continues to ignore my pleas of "Stay little! Stop growing so fast!"

This makes my heart sad. How did he get so big already?!


Alas.

Really though, each new day brings something new for him and for us. It's so fun to watch him experience new things and see the world through his eyes. When something catches his gaze, he stares so intently and with such curiosity. It makes you stop and think. 

Wow. Ceiling fans are a pretty cool invention.  (see what I did there?)

And watching out the window while we drive is nice indeed. 

And I guess hands are something fun to look at.

This is his face when he notices the fan in our room.


Last night, Aaron and I got to sneak out together for about an hour while my parents watched Graeme. We discussed the insanity that a whole month has passed since we became parents. As we were driving, Aaron said he was talking to Graeme earlier that evening about how God knew him before he was born. And how God knew everything about him already, like who his friends would be, what he would like to do, and what his favorite songs would be. (Side note: this makes me love my husband a million times more)

That's pretty awesome to think about. God knows Graeme completely and loves him unconditionally. God chose Aaron and I to be his parents, so we get to love him and learn everything about him as he grows up. 





This month has been challenging sometimes but very rewarding. I have loved being a mom. It has come to me pretty naturally, but then again I have wanted to be a mom since I was little and played with my baby dolls all the time. And I know being a nanny is not the same as being a mom, but I also believe my two years as a nanny were tremendously helpful in preparing me for motherhood. When I started keeping Keyen with me full-time, he was around 6-weeks-old. Bensen was 19 months or so. It's obviously different now in that I don't get to leave at the end of the day and have the weekend off. On the other hand, I'm not trying to keep up with a toddler as well...that was tricky! I am very grateful for my time with Bensen and Keyen, and I really learned a lot from being their nanny.


Me with baby Keyen.
Me with Graeme using the same carrier because Rodney and Sherry are awesome and gave it to us.



It's been fun getting to know Graeme this month.

Things that make him fuss are:

  • The beginning of baths. Once he starts getting warm water poured on him, he's fine.
  • The end of baths. He cries until he's dry and dressed.
  • The nasal aspirator. I think that would make anyone cry though.
  • Diaper changes when he's tired or hungry. If he's full and awake, he doesn't mind them much.
  • Otherwise, just normal baby cry things like random gas pains, being too tired or too hungry, wanting to switch positions, and occasionally a fussy time for no apparent reason.

This is a fussy face because he was done laying down and wanted to sit up.

He's a happy baby on the regular. He's never cried for a very long period of time. He's a content little guy and easy to please.

Naps are generally good for him and for me. He can nap pretty much anywhere, but we usually make sure he has his sound machine or if we are out we use an app on our phone to make the white noise that he's used to when he goes to sleep. We don't rock him to sleep and rarely let him have his pacifier to go to sleep (because he accidentally spits it out and then gets all frustrated and it prolongs his going to sleep...it's a whole ordeal). He'll nap in his crib, in his pack-n-play, in his rock-n-play, in his swing, in his carseat. We want him to be flexible. There have been a couple of days when he won't nap well. He sleeps for 45 minutes or an hour and then wakes up. Most days though, his naps are at least an hour and a half or two hours.

A nap in the carseat isn't so bad once in awhile.



Nights are great. I mean, no, we haven't slept an entire night straight in a month now, but considering that we have a newborn, nights are great. Graeme goes to bed in his crib between 7-8pm generally. We wake him (well, he's usually half awake at least) to feed him again between 10:30-11pm before we go to bed. For about a week, he would wake up at 1:30am no matter when his previous feeding was. But I think we've broken past that and he's slept until almost 3am for a couple of nights. Either way, he only wakes up twice during the night right now. After the first wake up, he wakes up again between 5am-6am. I am in no way ready to start the day then. If he could make it until 7am (heck, I would even take 6:45), we could work something out. But, he's yet to make it to 7am, so I put him back to bed. Then I make sure he's up by 8am at the latest to start the day.

This is what I had to wake up the other morning. It was hard. The cuteness was almost unbearable.



Graeme loves ceiling fans and lights, like I mentioned earlier. I guess all babies like those things, but its super cute to watch him fixate on them for minutes on end with barely a blink. Music captures his attention too, as well as being read to. He is getting good at tracking objects that move past his face and people as they walk back and forth and to and fro. I sure wish I knew what he was thinking.

When he's awake, he prefers to be upright instead of laying down. He's pretty good at holding his own head up. He doesn't mind tummy time as long as it's not a very long time. And he'll lay on his back for awhile if you're pumping his legs for him. He likes that a lot for some reason.

He likes riding in the car, and he actually stays awake in the car pretty often. We can see him in the mirror that hangs off the back seat, and he just stares out the window in awe. It can be a major distraction while driving because he's just too cute. Hopefully he'll enjoy our six hour car ride to Atlanta next week!

I could keep bragging about him, but I'll stop. I'm just perfectly smitten with this kid and I think he's the greatest. Also, this blog is where I keep track of my memories. And these are my memories of Graeme's first month on earth.





Our first month with Graeme was spectacular. I can't believe in only 11 more he will be one year! If the next eleven months go by as fast as the first one, we are in for a short year. We will not take any of it for granted.

I love you, Graeme! Happy one month!





Monday, April 21, 2014

about Graeme's first Easter

Graeme celebrated his first Easter this past weekend. Well, we probably had more fun celebrating it with him. He figured it was like any other day I suppose.

We started the celebrations on Saturday with the Bauer family. Graeme wore his Easter onesie that I bought him before he was born.


Cute, right?!


We went to his GiGi and Pop's house where he proceeded to take a long nap with Pop.



We all ate dinner while he continued to sleep. He was pretty sleepy that day.

Aaron and I took on the responsibility of opening his Easter basket goodies. He got way more loot than we did, as it should be I suppose.



Sunday, we spent the whole morning at Journey. I resumed my preschool worship leader duties that I've missed for the past few weeks. We had a great day and saw 100 people go public in baptism.

Graeme was looking pretty sharp in his Easter outfit. My friend Jessica made him some adorable bow ties and he wore one of those.



We got home from church and took a brief nap before it was time to head to Outback to celebrate Easter with my family.

Graeme was a sleepyhead through dinner again. Afterwards, we were all given our Easter baskets. The four big kids (me, Aaron, Tyler, and Sarah) got little baskets filled with candy and my mom's amazing homemade chocolate peanut butter eggs. Graeme got the biggest Easter basket known to man. Here's a size comparison:



He definitely made out pretty well for a four-week-old who was clueless to the Easter experience.

We got him an Easter basket too. It was not nearly as stuffed as the ones from his grandparents. Also, the chocolate bunny was in his basket from GiGi, but I think we will eat it for him. :)




We had so much fun celebrating our risen Savior with Graeme and can't wait to share many Easters with him. Also, we can't believe he turned four weeks old yesterday!



Thursday, April 17, 2014

while Graeme (hopefully) naps...and about old chewing gum

*Sigh*

I'm not saying that this is proven fact, but I think that because both sets of Graeme's grandparents were here for the majority of yesterday and held him for most of his naps, today he is not at all happy that mommy will not hold him all the day long. Hey, if it takes a day to get back in our groove, it's fine. Grandparent snuggles are worth it for sure. 

We've had three naps since we woke up this morning. Two lasted all of thirty minutes each. The third attempt we made it about an hour and 15 minutes. Now we will see what this nap holds. Seriously, the kid has got to be exhausted by this point! Here's hoping for a wonderful, long nap.



Yesterday, there was a meeting at work in the morning that lasted until lunch. My parents came up and watched Graeme so I could go. It was the first time I had done anything work-related since before Graeme was born. I definitely missed him a lot, but it was nice to be back at work for a morning. Next week I will be going to work with Graeme for a couple mornings, and once May hits, we will figure out my new schedule. My mom will be keeping Graeme and instead of working four short days like I did before he was here, I am planning to work two longer days. 

Anyway, after the meeting, I used my time without a baby in tow to stop by David's Bridal and try on and order the bridesmaid dress for my brother's wedding. I had been waiting until I wasn't pregnant to go get the dress. And I figured if I tried to go when I had Graeme with me it would be a little tricky in the dressing room. It didn't take long at all, and my dress should arrive in plenty of time before the wedding.




I relieved my parents yesterday for a couple of hours, but then we passed Graeme off again to Aaron's parents so we could go out on a date. It all happened to fall on the same day, and even though there was a short break in between the two times, it was the longest we had left Graeme. Eight hours total!

It was so nice to get out with just Aaron though. We went to Downtown Raleigh to eat dinner. We took our time and got to sit and talk for over an hour in a restaurant basically to ourselves because it was so early and the place was empty. After dinner, we opted out of a movie (our original plan) and walked around downtown instead. 



It was a little chilly! We wanted to find somewhere inside, but we were still too full to go to a coffee shop. And Raleigh is lame so all of the downtown shops were closed. I had the idea to go check on our gum. I can't remember if I've explained our gum on the blog before, but I'll do it again anyway...


December 31, 2008
On our first New Year's Eve as a "couple" (we still weren't Facebook official soo...) we spent the evening downtown with some friends. It was freezing, so while we waited for the acorn drop at midnight, we did our best to find places to stay warm. There is a Marriott hotel right next to all of the New Year's Eve festivities, so we meandered in there. We stumbled upon their parking garage underground that was basically deserted. It was here that the four of us planned the ultimate empty parking garage roller blading laser tag game. And it was here that Aaron became sick of chewing his gum.

He found this pillar:


December 31, 2008

...and he stuck his gum behind it.

We used to go check on our gum pretty frequently. It was even part of my engagement day scavenger hunt.


August 8, 2009

So, last night, I happened to think of it, and we decided to go check. The parking garage is still pretty empty. Although, they use Level P1 to house cop cars now. I got a little nervous that a police officer was going to jump out and think we were up to no good. I'm not sure "Oh! Sorry! We are going to check if a five-year-old wad of chewed gum is on this certain pillar down here!" would fly as a good excuse.

We made it to our pillar safely, however, and sure enough, there was our gum.


April 16, 2014
We left the parking garage in disbelief that the gum has been there for over five years.

On New Year's Eve of 2008 we had just begun a relationship. We had only been dating for less than two months. I didn't even refer to Aaron as my boyfriend. Heck, I was still completely tongue-tied when I talked to him!

Now, our gum is still there, but we've come so very far. Five years later, we're almost four years into marriage, in a house, with a dog, and we have a baby!

I really hope the Marriott Convention Center parking garage Level P1 never undergoes a major cleaning. I hope in 50 years we can hobble down the steps (or maybe use the elevator at that point) and still be able to find our gum on that random pillar.




I suppose I shouldn't press my time any longer and go do some things that aren't as fun (aka fold laundry) while the little one is still asleep. 


Happy Easter weekend!







Sunday, April 13, 2014

about Graeme's third week of life (and here are some newborn pictures!)

Graeme is three weeks old today!


He brings so much joy to our life. It's been our greatest adventure yet figuring out this parenting thing one day at a time. (If you think about more than just the day you're in, it's too much to think about!)

Graeme woke up for his middle of the night feeding at 2:15 this morning. I was holding him and glanced at the clock around 2:28. I told him how only three weeks ago we were just two minutes away from meeting him for the first time. It was pretty cool to be awake  with him at exactly 2:30am when he officially turned three weeks old. 





We took him on his first big outing on Friday. We swung by the Caribou Coffee drive-thru (he'll be pretty familiar with Caribou) and then went to Crabtree Valley Mall. The real reason for our trip to this particular mall was so that we could take Graeme for his very first visit to The Disney Store. We tried to plan our visit so that he would be awake for The Disney Store, but despite our great efforts, he slept the entire time.

Aaron was pretty excited, if you can imagine.
But Graeme, in his mouse ears, was dead to the world. Even the Disney world.
There was a SUPER nice cast member (store employee) that was so happy that we brought him and thought he was just adorable. She took our picture with a giant stuffed Mickey and gave Graeme a certificate to commemorate his visit (since the sleepyhead won't remember it otherwise!).

We might have been a little more excited than Graeme for this whole experience.



And we couldn't leave without buying Graeme his very first Mickey Mouse.


Oh, and before we left the mall, we of course had to buy him a couple of cute outfits from Baby Gap and make a stop at one of our other favorite stores that he must also love one day. No Androids or PCs around here.






We had a great week. Graeme is doing very well at night. He wakes every 3-4 hours to eat, but he goes right back to sleep afterwards. We have made the transition to the crib, and he has slept in there every night since Tuesday night. I leave the video monitor on next to my bedside so I can still see him anytime. In the morning, he typically wakes (or I wake him) to start the day between 7:15-7:45. From then on, we eat, have awake time, and take a nap in cycles throughout the day. He's a pretty easy going kid. We get along just fine.







Penny has made this transition pretty smoothly. Every once in awhile she will try to choose a very inopportune time to play (like when I'm home alone and trying to change a dirty diaper she goes and finds the squeakiest toy and paws at my legs relentlessly). She is very patient mostly though, and I think she accepts her demotion in the family well. We still love her to pieces and try to lavish attention on her when Graeme is sleeping or when we do have a free hand. She loves Graeme and the hardest thing for her is the fact that we will not let her attack his face with kisses (she's managed to sneak a few in though!).






I will leave you with a few of Graeme's newborn pictures that they took in the hospital. They send a photographer to your room to take pictures (you can decline if you want). There is no obligation to buy any of them, so we let the lady take them. When she brought back the slideshow later, there were a few that I really liked. Some were not that great. She told us we had two weeks to go online and buy them before they were unavailable. When we saw the prices, we had no intention of buying any of them!

However, when Graeme's two week birthday rolled around and we knew the pictures were to be gone by the end of the day, we went back on the site to at least watch the slideshow one last time. I think we both should have known that was a mistake...

I was holding my two-week-old son and watching this slideshow of adorable pictures from the day he was born. And of course the background music is this perfect song that made me start sobbing. Aaron just shook his head and pulled out his wallet.

He said, "They know what they're doing! They know the dads and moms will watch this again when the pictures are about to expire. They picked that song so that the moms will cry and the dads will have to buy all of these pictures! They are so smart!"

I'm embarrassed to say how much we dropped for the digital prints, but it's our first kid and he's adorable. Oh well.








Wednesday, April 9, 2014

while someone else takes care of the baby

Hello, everyone.

My awesome dad-in-law had a free afternoon today. He came over, took Graeme from me, and sent me upstairs to do whatever I wanted for a couple of hours. I'm pretty excited about it.

I just painted my nails for my first act of "me time." I had been scared to attempt that during nap time because I just knew Graeme would wake up when I had two hands full of wet nails. The struggle.

Anyway, here I am now sitting on my bed with Penny (who is also enjoying time sans baby, I believe). I figure a blog post was in order since writing is fun and relaxes me.




Graeme is 17 days old now. He had his two-week appointment on Monday. He is now 9 pounds, 2 ounces and 22 inches long. Somehow, he is in the 97% for height...I'm not sure how he is so "tall." The doctor says he looks great and encouraged us that we are doing a good job. That's very reassuring to hear from a doctor. We figure we aren't totally screwing this whole thing up, but it's nice to get it affirmed by someone else that has a degree in kid's health.

Oh, also at the doctor appointment, we heard a new pronunciation of Graeme's name that takes the cake to anything else we've heard. The nurse came to the waiting room and asked for "Gray-ah-may." We couldn't help but laugh. That's just the worst non-name ever. She felt bad about it, but we told her she wasn't the first to say his name wrong. She made a pronunciation note for future reference.




I mentioned in my last post that we were going to make the transition to the pack-n-play from the "taco bed." It's gone pretty well. According to the doctor, Graeme is in the middle of or about to hit a growth spurt. So that may attribute a bit to his waking more frequently the past two nights. He does act awful hungry! Or it could be from the new sleeping arrangement. We press on though. It's not so bad. He is just waking every two-three hours instead of sleeping until we wake him up, which had been our norm. It also takes him a bit longer to drift off in the middle of the night, but we let him fuss it out for a few minutes and then he puts himself to sleep.




Now that I am basically here by myself during the day, Graeme and I are figuring out our routine better. I am determined to teach him to put himself to sleep in his crib or wherever else he needs to sleep. He typically does great and falls asleep pretty fast. A couple naps a day I have to let him cry it out a little. I of course make sure he's not in misery with a dirty diaper or a burp that needs to be burped. But if he's dry, full, and just wants to be held, it's time for him to cry it out for a bit. It's tough, but when I actually watch the clock he only cries for less than ten minutes. I know it will be worth it.




Monday I made it my goal to do laundry (not necessarily fold and put it away though) and clean our bedroom and bathroom. I figured that was pretty attainable on my first day home alone. Graeme cooperated and I completed my tasks. That felt good.

It's pretty easy for me to start thinking about all of the things that need to be done or that I want to get done and spiral my brain into stress. I want the house clean, there's laundry to be done (always), my blog is neglected, the baby book needs to be filled out, I want to order some prints of Graeme's pictures, I should call my grandmas, and oh the list goes on. I quickly stop myself and remind myself that there is time for everything but not all in one day anymore. By making small goals each day of the week, I can still get things done and feel accomplished. And I don't tire myself out either.

It's also true that I would much rather have servants that did everything for me and just stare at Graeme all day. Again, the struggle. (Although he still takes precedence over anything around the house!)

It's definitely going to take some time to figure out how everything works now that there's a little one to care for in the midst of it. Aaron has been amazing at helping with so many things. It's been more of a struggle for me to let things go and let him help. Before Graeme came, it wasn't that he wouldn't help me do things, but I liked to do them myself. I liked taking care of anything and everything to do with cooking, cleaning, and housework so that he wouldn't have to worry about any of it. At most, I might ask him to take the trash to the dumpster on his way out the door or carry the vacuum downstairs for me. I didn't even let him help me much when I was pregnant.

Now, I realize that it's ridiculous for me to try to do everything. I would go crazy. I need Aaron's help! And he of course is very happy to oblige. We are having fun being a team and taking care of things together. I can't imagine doing this without him.




Well, I think that's about all for now. I will be back for another post as soon as I can! There are two boys and a dog that are a lot higher up on my list right now. :)













Sunday, April 6, 2014

two weeks into this thing

Two weeks ago at this time I was sitting in a hospital bed holding my brand new baby boy that was born just that morning. I can't believe he's two weeks old!


Me and Graeme before we moved out of the delivery room.


Before we were parents, we heard countless times, "They grow up so fast!" or "Time speeds by!" or "They'll be grown in the blink of an eye!"

Yeah.

That's all totally true. We get it now.

I have cried about four times in the past 24 hours just thinking of how much he's already grown.


His going home from the hospital outfit (pictured) is about to be too small already! :(


Anyway.

I am not sure the goal of this blog post other than a random assortment of catching up. Here goes...



Graeme was born very early on a Sunday morning (figures he would come on the busiest day of the week for the majority of his close family and friends...even his own father). We could have stayed in the hospital until Tuesday, but the thought of another night in the hospital bed with the constant interruptions was not appealing to me at all. I just can't sleep well at the hospital. It was the same when I had my thyroid removed.

Despite hardly any sleep while we were at the hospital, I was on an adrenaline high or something. The fact that I had gotten about eight hours of sleep in 48 hours didn't hit me until we did get home on Monday night. I wasn't sure what kind of sleep we would be in for that night with a newborn and no nurses to whisk him off to the nursery. To my delight, we have an angel baby who SLEEPS SO WELL AT NIGHT.

We are two weeks in now, and Graeme has yet to have a bad night of sleep. I am just waiting for that all-nighter to come. Of course, I don't want it to, but I am waiting.

We feed him one last time before we go to bed between 11:00-11:30pm. We lay him down still awake and he puts himself to sleep. Then I have to wake him up for the next feeding. Last night, I totally slept through my alarm to wake him up in the middle of the night. (Our pediatrician doesn't want him to go longer than four hours at night for now.) I accidentally slept an hour past when I had meant to wake him up. When I did wake up out of the blue, Graeme was still sound asleep. I felt a little bad, but I know if he was really hungry he would let us know!

Anyway, after he eats and gets his diaper changed in the middle of the night, he goes right back to sleep in his little Rock-n-Play all by himself. Then, he sleeps until between 6:30-7:30am. I am okay with that wake up time.

Tonight, we are going to try to make the transition from the Rock-n-Play to the Pack-n-Play. (That all-nighter I'm waiting for might be fast approaching...) I am hoping he's not too attached to his little "taco bed" as I like to call it, after just two weeks. We don't want him to get so used to sleeping in it that it comes back to bite us later. A flat sleeping surface is headed his way in just a couple hours. We'll see how it goes. And then before too long we will promote him all the way to his crib.


This is where he's been sleeping at night. It's pretty cozy.



So that's how night sleeping is going.



The daytime is just as fun. We implemented the eat-wake-sleep routine as soon as we could. He took to it like a champ. I sure do love him. The routine is good for all of us.

When he's awake, (which isn't ever for terribly long, although in the past week he's been much more alert) he likes to listen to music, listen to books, look in the mirror, watch his swing mobile, have tummy time, or just listen to someone talk to him. He sure is easy to entertain right now. He and Aaron are reading Peter Pan together. At night, we are all reading The Jesus Storybook Bible.






Things Graeme does not like include diaper changes, clothes changes, sponge baths (he's had one full bath since his cord came off...he wasn't as angry about it as a sponge bath, but didn't love it either), having his face wiped, getting the straps put on him in his carseat (once it's buckled, he's fine), and when his food is not quite ready at his demand.


He really hated his first sponge bath at home...




That's how the daytime goes.




What else?

Well, my mom was a HUGE help for the first two weeks. We didn't do laundry, cleaning, or anything really. Aaron helped occasionally, but he was usually sent away to sit down and rest too. She took care of our house, made our bed every time we took a nap, and even got us groceries. It was awesome. She's the best.

We have also been completely spoiled by our wonderful church family. We have had dinner brought to us almost every night. It has been amazing. Meals are still coming this week. I'm pretty sure I'm not going to remember how to cook or ever want to again. We feel so loved and appreciate everyone that has helped us so much.



I guess I'll end with a sentimental paragraph now...


I have always wanted to be a mom. I can't believe I finally am! It has made me love Jesus more. It brings His love for me into a brand new light. It has made me love my husband more. Watching Aaron be a dad and tackling this new adventure with him has been the funnest part of our marriage so far. I love Graeme so unconditionally and feel like he fits right in to our family perfectly. One of our wise friends told us this about becoming parents:


"Your kid is the only person you love before you ever get to know them. You love them right away. Anyone else in your life, you get to know them before you love them. They have to earn your love. Not your child. The moment you see them, you love them unconditionally."